Laurie's Life (Denver Style)

See how our family is doing since moving from Cali to Colorado

Thursday, June 7, 2007


Last night went very well. Food was good. No Slick, there's no dip left. Everyone had fun playing the Wii.

Last night went very well until my middle child got into a top cabinet to get a pencil. Getting said pencil knocked, unbeknownst to anyone, a bottle of fabric paint onto the floor. Said fabric paint fell right in front of two four year olds. These four year olds took the fabric paint into the bathroom where my son apparently proceeded to paint himself ALL OVER.

After the screaming subsided (this was more from having red fabric paint all over the living room carpet than from having a red boy) the boys told us that my son's friend had painted my son even though my son told him not to. Both boys copped to this same story. So riddle me this Batman...why did my son's friend have NOT ONE MOTHERHUMPING DROP OF PAINT ON HIM?

Friends left. Bath was given. Took over 30 mins and half a bottle of Bath and Body Works coconut body scrub to get all the paint off my child. Then it was bedtime.

Bedtime is the best time of day. It means that I now get to go to bed as well, if I choose. Last night I chose to stay up and watch t.v. with the hubby until midnight. Not too smart but not so bad as I don't have to wake up until 8 to take my girls to school. Not so bad unless my darling 9 year old, who has been a horrible pain in the ass to put to bed since school started back up, decides to wake me up at 2.

I go thorough an hour of "Mommy, I'm scared. The dog's barking at something." "Mommy, my throat feels tight. I can't breath" (to this I replied "then get a fucking drink of water" I'm such a good mom) "Mommy I think there's bad people in the house who might kill us (to this I told her "the only person in the house who's going to kill you will be me if you don't go to sleep") She finally settled down at the end of our bed and spent the next hour tossing and turning until she was in a ball at the bottom of my feel.

I am tired this morning. I think I got like negative sleep, my legs hurt from sleeping in a super tight fetal position, and I'm just pissed off because really I hate being woken up in the middle of the night. It's going to be a fun day.


  • At June 7, 2007 at 9:19 AM , Anonymous Lorrie said...

    I'd have just thrown the boy away. In the trash. Too much work to clean him up.

    Do you suppose they make beds with restraints? Could come in handy for the kids.

    Okay, you're a better mom.

  • At June 7, 2007 at 9:58 AM , Anonymous themuttprincess said...

    Ohhhh... Noooooo. 4 year olds and paint. Ouch. Glad you got the boys clean.... And hopefully your carpet!

  • At June 7, 2007 at 10:05 AM , Blogger Tim said...

    oh, the joys I have ahead of me..

  • At June 7, 2007 at 11:01 AM , Blogger Blazngfyre said...

    Which is why I have banned paint (in ANY FORM) from my house!
    Along with:
    Glue bottles

    There's more, I just can't remember at the moment as I too am sleep deprived from a 2 yr old hurling himself down the hallway screaming like his ass was on fire at about 2am or so.
    WTF IS it about kids waking at 2am anyway?

    Damn crumb-grubbin rug apes ...

  • At June 7, 2007 at 11:16 AM , Blogger Blazngfyre said...

    Just thought of another one, and the reason why I have banned these substances (and others) from my home.

    Silly putty.
    Ground into a dark green velour (?) recliner.
    I made The Boy scrub till his little fingers were bleeding. (Almost)
    Since then, NO MORE!!!!!!

  • At June 7, 2007 at 11:28 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    I hate being woken up, as well. It's garnered me a rep for being a child- hater; I'm not I just hate being woken up. I'll spazz at whomever has woken me up no matter the age.

    I generally find myself scrunched up at night as well but that's due to my large cat who takes up 2/3 of my bed. :(

  • At June 7, 2007 at 1:53 PM , Blogger Skittles said...

    I know you're pissed, but I hope you don't mind that I chuckled a little cuz it was your kids and not mine! :)

  • At June 7, 2007 at 3:49 PM , Blogger Mz Jackson said...

    Hope your day got better and I hope you got a nap. You deserve one!

  • At June 7, 2007 at 5:25 PM , Blogger Canadian flake said...

    lmao...I am so sorry but I can NOT help but have a good giggle at the thought of your kids being covered in paint. That sooooo sounds like something my son would have done when he was Thank god I didn't have paint in the house..lmao. Man I don't miss those days of being woken in the middle of the night.

  • At June 7, 2007 at 10:40 PM , Blogger Burfica said...

    my son took markers and drew a meteor storm and space ship fight all over his chest and stomach when he was younger. Took two weeks to wear off. My friends daughter colored her face black with a permanant magic marker. Said she wanted to be an indian. After she scrubbed for four hours, she just looked like she had beat the crap out of her and her whole face was bruised, and she had to send her to school.

    Oh the good old days.

    I ban silly putty, super glue, and white out still. hehehehe and he's 11.

    My son went through that scared of everything, and night mare crap when he was 9. After getting grounded for so long and all his t.v., game and toys taken away he knocked it off.

    Now he just/still sleep walks, so I haven't gotten a full night sleep since he was born. Did I mention he was 11? *sigh*

  • At June 8, 2007 at 2:10 AM , Blogger egan said...

    I played the Wii for the first time last weekend. Good times for sure. Bedtime is a good time of the day. I should really consider sleeping now.

  • At June 8, 2007 at 5:24 AM , Blogger Chris said...

    Ahhh, negative sleep. Yes, I'm familiar with that concept. I hope you have a more restful day!

  • At June 8, 2007 at 6:09 AM , Blogger Trish said...

    this is when we would say in our house, "good times, good times!

  • At June 8, 2007 at 6:40 AM , Anonymous slick said...

    Good thing I ain't got to live with you :)

    Especially since won't nobody save me any dip but I can see that now is not the time to argue about that.

    Your boy sounds like a young Slick....lucky you ;)

  • At June 8, 2007 at 2:30 PM , Anonymous naynayfazz said...

    The sixth paragraph kind of sounds like my house when I was a kid. But my mom would usually say, "GO TO SLEEP OR I AM GOING TO GET THE BELLLLLLTTT!"

    Ah, childhood. I gotta go call my therapist now. :)

  • At June 10, 2007 at 7:15 AM , Blogger Hammer said...

    I get the toothpaste and markers..fabric paint? Ugh that's awful stuff.

    Kids are a pain but we can always look back and laugh

  • At June 10, 2007 at 7:45 AM , Blogger Rebecca said...

    It pisses me off to be woken in the middle of the night too. Grrrr!!!


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